It was a sultry summer afternoon, when I first met her. She was sitting in a chair wearing a gown and appeared quiet & attentive as I was introducing myself, to her mother. The imposing older lady was to be my future grandma-in-law from my mom-in-law's side. I turned myself to her and saw a lovely lady with large eyes and fair skin, with a welcome-smile for me. She was to be my future aunt-in-law (the youngest aunt of my husband). When I took the decision to break all tradition & rules of a well known Malayali tharavad and get married to a young Bengali man, it was a leap forward several times in our large Nambiar family. But, I was young and adamant and gave an ultimatum to my parents. Once they met my future husband, they were all for it. And so, that was how I got married in true Malayali Nair style to a Bengali household. I say "household" because, the relationship encompassed lots of uncles, aunties, cousins & 2 grandmas at my in-laws and I was to become inextricably involved in the tribulations, pains, happiness & sorrows of these lovely people. So, that is how the youngest aunty , whom they fondly called - Rangamashi, came to represent my wedding with uncle (her husband). She was an epitome of grace & beauty and everybody was taken in by her at Kerala. Later, when she contracted the deadly Cancer, which eroded her body with a vengeance, we could only marvel at her strength of mind. She fought & fought and never did we see her cry in public. We were amazed & appalled too, by her strength of mind. She went through the surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, hormone therapy & numerous medications with a single-purpose mind - not to let her dear ones know how much she suffered. She knew that if she breaks down, the whole family which rallied behind her also breaks down. In the midst of all this, uncle suffered a massive heart attack; his 3rd and underwent a bypass surgery. It was a crucial stage for everybody but, this lady fought with all her mind. We knew we were losing her, as the disease had ravaged her liver. I saw her daily, as I work from a space in her house and can see her even now, coming down the stairs to have tea with us, as always in the evening. I grew up & matured 10 years in a year......in 2009, on June 21st, she gave up, the fight was over and we learned a lot from this great lady, how to fight and never give up, never, never. Soon, it will be 21st June 2010 and we will remember that fateful day. But, it plays almost daily in my mind. I take this opportunity to pay my homage to Rangamashi with utmost love & happiness (as she would have wanted), for all the lovely times we had together. May she always be happy, wherever she is and may she be a reminder for all of us, to savour life with all its happiness & sorrow.
